What Question is Calling You Today?
– #9 What Fears Drive Me?
- Fear is a fickle companion.
- Some fears can drive us on whilst others hold us back.
- Feelings as a whole are an expression of our psychological reality so can resist logical realities.
- The first step is acknowledging the place fear plays in our lives.
- So, ask yourself:
- What fears drive me on?
- And equally, what fears are holding me back?
– #130 What Can I Do Today to Shape My Legacy?
- This is an edgy question for me and precisely because of that I am leaning into it.
- There can be a tendency to make our worlds too small, too tactical and big questions offer perspective.
- They can also give permission to trim down the to-do list and focus on the essential.
- And what could be more essential than the lasting impact, or ‘ripples’, our lives create?
- In a sense, we are living the legacy of our past actions every day.
– #136 What Have I Settled For?
- Our life choices say a lot about our innermost longings, expectations and needs.
- They speak to what we think of ourselves, and what we think we deserve in life (or will settle for).
- They are an indicator of our priorities and values.
- So, what have you settled for?
- And what does it say about you?
– #141 What Story Have I Told Too Many Times?
- Stories are a central part of the human experience.
- Indeed, our identity is an evolving story of who we tell ourselves we are.
- Some of these stories free us to be superstars, others imprison us into a smaller version of ourselves.
- These may be the stories we need to stop telling if we are to be free of our past selves and flourish into who we are now.
- So, what story may you have told too many times?
- What story might you tell instead?
– #175 What is Beyond My Control?
- Do you ever find yourself worrying about things beyond your control?
- You are not alone. And yet, this means placing our happiness at the mercy of fate.
- The first step in taking back our power is acknowledging our inherent powerlessness.
– #177 How Badly Have I Failed?
- We have all failed in some way but only the truly ambitious rack up big failures.
- So, how ambitious have you been?
– #179 What Are My Values?
- The idea of values is a widely abused term, particularly amongst corporates and brands.
- The reason for this is that values go deep.
- They are the basic (mostly unwritten) rules that allow us to process the world and live our lives.
- They are the rules for which some people are willing to die or dedicate their lives to furthering.
- What about you? What do you hold dearest?
– #199 What Can My Stress Teach Me?
- Thinking back over the most stressful situations in my life and what triggers my stress in general, I have a question:
- What can I learn from it?
– #201 Who Is the Master and Who Is the Student?
- Zen masters often bamboozle new students by saying that they have nothing to teach.
- By contrast, in Western cultures, knowledge has long been the mark of mastery.
- How does the concept of ‘having nothing to teach’ challenge your understanding of mastery and the acquisition of knowledge?
– #202 How Am I Being Defensive?
- There can be a tendency to identify ourselves with what we do or who we are.
- Any criticism can therefore feel personal.
- What if we didn’t?
- How might we respond?
– #206 How Am I Being Impatient?
- Impatience is a patient teacher.
- Regardless of whether we listen, it keeps showing us where our psychology is still tripping up us.
– #237 How Am I Deluding Myself?
- Being human inherently involves self-delusion.
- From the moment we open our eyes, we interpret the world in ways that may not mirror some objective reality.
- For instance, do colours truly exist outside of our perception?
- Our brain processes such an overwhelming amount of sensory information that it has to be selective about what it presents to us.
- And this is just regarding the tangible, objective world.
- What about our internal, psychological realm?
- How might we be deluding ourselves there?
– #255 Why Don’t Good Things Last in My Life?
- We don’t control what happens to us, but we do control how we respond.
- That is the only thing that is within our power.
- In short, we get to write the story.
- We can decide to classify everything as “Good” and “Bad” and put our fate in the hands of fortune or we can embrace life no matter what it throws at us.
– #257 Who Do I Feel I Need to Be?
- Ever find yourself in a new situation where nobody knew you?
- Did you feel you could be a little freer and behave differently?
- Be someone different in many ways?
- If you have, you already know that your normal persona is just that – a persona.
- A role or set of roles you play.
- The question really is:
- Who would you be if were free of your own and other people’s expectations?
– #294 What is My Relationship with Feedback?
- Reality, as David Whyte the poet says, is the frontier between our own stories and other people’s stories. Feedback lives on that frontier!
- Its purpose is to puncture our own stories and bring us precious insights from the outside world.
- The key is how we respond:
- If you find yourself classifying the feedback as positive or negative, ask yourself how is this helpful?
- If you find yourself resisting the feedback – being defensive or feeling this is unfair – ask yourself how is this helpful?
- Just be grateful and then mine the feedback for whatever insights it might offer!