Experiences are, by definition, best lived. Descriptions are but poor imposters. To that end, feel free to schedule a quick call and if we feel we’re a match we can arrange a full session in which you can live what is on offer. The following description speaks to one-to-one work but I also facilitate groups.
What It Might Feel Like For You!
- Deep coaching is about being truly listened to – almost like you’ve never been listened to in your life.
- It is about not being interrupted.
- It is about slowing down and listening to yourself.
- It is about possibility – the focus is on the next step you can take – the next threshold you might cross.
- Judgement has no place – there is no problem to fix – just deep choices to be made about your future.
- It is about complete confidentiality – you can say what you need to say – what you have never said to anyone.
Let the words of my clients seep into your soul:
“Tom’s innate ability to listen and empathise enabled me to relax and really explore the issues that were causing me some anxiety.”
“Tom’s approach is based on taking it slow, listening first and asking questions you won’t have thought of second. The latter always result in positive actions to take away and implement immediately.
“Tom listened without judgement, guided without being opinionated and ultimately helped me to help myself. You can’t ask more from a coach.”
Other Aspects of the Experience!
Integrative Approach: Different Hats!!
Coaching is an amazing skill and I have seen its power first-hand. I try to bring it to bear as much as possible as I work with clients both individually and in groups.
My sense is that me asking questions will generally offer you more than me answering them. That said, there are times, particularly in terms of implementing change, when it can make sense to switch hats and skills such as facilitating and mentoring can be really beneficial.
I also have a background in project management and management and at times feel those skills being called in. If, as we work together, you feel one or other hat would be most helpful for you at that point I will happily wear it and share my experience and skills in whatever form will make a positive difference for you!!
Sustainability: One of the big questions for me right now is “What sort of ancestor do I want to be?”. I have two teenage kids so I have skin in the game. My commitment to a sustainable future translates into business practices that are designed to limit the carbon footprint as much as possible. This means I primarily meet clients online rather than travel to their premises. All my electricity is from renewable sources and all other emissions are offset via Tree Nation.
Silence: In normal conversation, silence may feel uncomfortable. In coaching there is an invitation to embrace it when it feels right. I have been inspired by so many from Thich Nhat Hanh to Nancy Kline but these words from the Canadian First Nations writer, Richard Wagemese, really resonate:
There is such a powerful eloquence in silence. True genius is knowing when to say nothing, to allow the experience, the moment itself, to carry the message, to say what needs to be said. When you can sit in perfect silence with someone, you truly know how to communicate. [Therefore . . .] Pack light. Carry only when you need for the journey. Don’t tire yourself out with unnecessary stuff.
Interruption: Interruptions are all around us and prevent us from letting out thinking go where it might. This process is about you and not about me so my preference is typically not to interrupt. That said, depending on where you are on your journey and what you are looking for we may need to reflect together on what feels right in a given circumstance.
Safe space: The idea is that we can create a safe space where you can just be. That’s the starting point. There is often a sense of “can I really talk about that in coaching?” – I would simply say put out there what you need to say and let’s take it from there.
Play: I like to experiment – it is part of my own playfulness and helps change perspective at times. So if you’re comfortable at times I may suggest we try out different approaches that might be helpful and allow us to be creative. I will check with you first to see if you’re comfortable with that.