What Question is Calling You Today?

– #14 How Do I Make Commitments to Myself?

  • Committing to ourselves is simple in theory but complex in practice.
    • How do we bridge the gap between intention and action, ensuring our commitments result in the change we say we want?

– #17 Why Are We Having This Meeting?

  • Meetings are a major organisational challenge, primarily because most meetings are unproductive, and ultimately not only about what is on the agenda.
    • How are your meetings different?

– #20 What Was My Most Memorable Moment Today?

  • Daniel Kahneman, Nobel prize winner, speaks of experiencing selves and remembering selves.
  • The idea is that what we experience live and what we remember are two very separate forms of experience.
  • Each day you live a full day and yet, over time, you only remember a relatively small number of moments. Which ones?

– #54 What Conversations Do I Need to Nurture?

  • Some conversations blossom slowly, requiring years of patient nurturing.
  • Like a gardener tending to plants, we must carefully cultivate these dialogues, not rushing to decisions but allowing the conversation itself to mature and unfold.
  • This is about engaging in thoughtful exploration and preparation, and recognizing the long-term conversations that might bear fruit in years to come.
    • What are you planting for the future?

– #115 How Do I Feel I Am Disappointing Others?

  • From an early age it is only natural to want to please our parents and guardians.
  • This can carry into adulthood as we continually seek some form of external approval.
  • In doing so, we risk placing our joy and happiness outside ourselves.
    • How do you feel you may have failed to live up to other people’s expectations?
    • Does it matter?

– #116 What Expectations Do I Create for Conversations?

  • This is a recurring theme in my client work.
  • A client might say “I have a difficult conversation I need to have – let’s work through it.”
  • The first question is “What makes a conversation difficult?
  • Our answer to this question holds secrets to much of our psychology.

– #151 What Conversations Am I Avoiding?

  • We sometimes paint conversations as ‘tough’, ‘uncomfortable’ and even ‘hard’.
  • And yet, how we think about conversations affects how willing we are to engage in them.
    • How might we think about such conversations in ways that release the tension?

– #176 How Do I Measure Diversity of Thought?

  • Diversity brings different perspectives.
  • Historically, diversity was something you could assess by looking around the table.
    • But what about diversity of thought?
    • How do you measure that?

– #200 What Concerns Might Stakeholders Have?

  • Decisions often seem straightforward from our personal perspective.
  • But have you considered what your stakeholders might think?
  • Try visualizing everyone at the table, voicing their views.
    • What are they hearing?
    • What might they want to know?
    • What might their concerns be?
  • Exploring these and other questions can significantly enhance your decision-making process.

– #208 What Would Make This Conversation Valuable?

  • We don’t always set the proper intentions for conversations or communicate properly to others our purpose behind a particular conversation.

– #209 Who Isn’t in the Room?

  • Key question in decision-making:
    • Who isn’t in the room who may need to be involved?
    • What is their relationship with this process?

– #217 How Am I Contributing to the Conversation?

  • Conversations can often resemble a series of loosely connected monologues rather than a genuine dialogue between peers.
  • Frequently, I find myself in discussions where it isn’t clear what is going on, prompting me to ask:
    • What are we truly discussing?
  • And yet, I also need to consider my own role:
    • Why am I having this conversation?
    • What assumptions am I making?
    • What is this really about?

– #229 How Do I Tend to Relationships Over Time?

  • Transactions can be instant. Relationships require time.
  • This is an important distinction.
  • If we’re honest, most connecting and networking is primarily transactional in nature whilst our relationships limp along, lost in the mist of our busyness.
  • And yet, our relationships define who we are.
  • I like to talk about the 3 Cs of relationships: Cultivate, Cherish and Compost.
    • What relationship might you cherish today?

– #256 How Do I Greet Others?

  • I increasingly find that greetings lack connection.
  • The words are saying one thing and the body language something different.
  • It is as if we aren’t fully present – simply rushing by to get to our next meeting or back to something more important.
    • What might it be like to truly slow down and connect?
    • To get a sense that we are not alone in this world?
    • To satisfy that deep craving for connection?
    • To be seen and heard? And to see and to hear?

– #278 What Is Taboo?

  • Do you feel free to say whatever you want whenever you want? To whomever you want?
  • We not only self-censure individually but also as societies.
  • There are certain topics that can’t be discussed or at least not by everyone.
  • It is the reverse of “What am I expected to say?
    • So, what are you allowed to say?
    • What are you expected to say?

– #285 What Responsibility Do I Have for Being Heard?

  • When communicating we often assume that our role is simply to speak and it is up to the others to listen, hear and understand.
    • And yet, does our responsibility stop there?
    • Is communicating speaking or being understood?
    • In other words, if we aren’t being understood, are we communicating?
    • What then might we do differently to get our message across?