What truly is silence? As I write this, the rain is bouncing off the windows and the world is alive with sound. And yet, I would happily call this silence as there is not a single humanmade “noise” to be heard.
Indeed, is silence even something that solely resides in the outside world? I may be outwardly in silence whilst the voices in my head are clamouring for attention. Conversely, there may be complete silence in my head in the midst of outer clamour.
I certainly know which of these states I prefer. If I am simply out in the world, that inner silence allows me to be in complete harmony with whatever is going on around me regardless of whether cars are honking or birds chirping. Nothing can intrude on that inner silence.
And that is not to say that inner silence can override outer noise. There are times when outer noise grabs our attention and distracts us from what we actually want to be doing – thinking, writing, listening. And yet the extent of the distraction depends on the nature of the sound. A bird singing doesn’t feel the same as a truck reversing.
Silence might therefore be better thought of as an experience rather than an objective state of affairs. How then might we be resisting this experience?
Embracing the Experience
We can for starters think differently about how we interpret “noise”. If trees can creak, animals scurry and birds sing in a silent wood, surely any “noise” can become our friend?
Within, we might pay more attention to our inner voices. The more we busy ourselves with activities and noise in the outer world, the louder these voices often get as they try to get our attention.
This is certainly what happens to me. It is only when I contemplate or meditate in some form and give the voices my attention and the time to say what needs to be said that they calm down. That they feel heard!
I have worked with clients who fill their worlds with noise to avoid being alone with their inner voices. They play music when running, turn on the radio in the car, spend their days in meetings, leave the TV on at home – anything to avoid being alone with themselves and the possibility of silence.
In many ways it feels that our spiritual selves live in that inner silence. Unless we create space for them, we may have a feeling of being hollow, of not knowing who we are or what our true voice sounds like.
The “Where” in “Where Do I Need Silence Right Now?” can mean many things. It can obviously relate to some environment you inhabit. It can, however, be a little more abstract and enquire as to what part of your life (including your work) may benefit from silence.
There are relationships that we crowd out with noise. Relationships that would benefit from some space. Some silence. Some stillness.
There are also voices within us that drown out others. Imagine for a moment all the voices in your psyche as forming a circle with the loudest voices towards the centre and the quieter voices on the outsides.
Just observe where each voice is. What voices are you struggling to hear amidst the cacophony? What voices are “too” loud?
Now, give silence a voice. Ask the other voices to take a breath and listen to what silence has to say.
In the words of Rumi, “silence is the language of God; it speaks to the soul.“
What is it telling you?
Rather than fill your head with my words, my invitation is to take a moment, and perhaps a pen and paper, to contemplate these questions in your own words.
- Where is silence in my life?
- What type of silence would I like to embrace?
- What might need to be released to make space?
- What one thing can I do right now to make that happen?
“This silence, this moment, every moment, if it is genuinely inside you, brings what you need.” – Rumi
Questions for Reflection
Questions in the Image:
- Where is the silence?
- How have I resisted silence?
- Where do I need silence right now?
- How might I clear more space for silence?
Want to Further Explore This Theme?
In truth, to explore silence we need to experience silence. The invitation would be to combine stillness with silence in the form of some meditative practice. Remember, silence is not just about the noise outside but also the noise inside.
That said, if you feel called to read further around this theme, Silence: In the Age of Noise by Erling Kagge (link to Amazon.co.uk) may offer some contemporary insights.
Next Steps – From Reflection to Action: These reflections model pausing and thinking, and hopefully show how this can quickly translate into fresh insights and decisive actions. They are centred around three “archetypal” questions:
- What have I learnt?
- What do I need right now? and
- What are my intentions?
The aim is to practice translating newfound insights into viable options.
Nurturing Curiosity – Daily Practice: This is part of the Nurturing Curiosity series of tools, insights and questions designed to help nurture curiosity as part of our daily practice. In point of fact, every interaction we have is an opportunity to question what we are observing and how we and others are seeing the world. Also remember that questions come in many forms throughout our day.
Just now, as I see a figure walking into the distance with a small bag on his back, I am curious as to the horizons he is uncovering. I wonder: What new horizons may be waiting for me?
About Tom O’Leary
Tom guides bold pioneers through inner transitions towards regenerative futures.
His primary offering – through a process he calls Ecological Coaching – is about working with leaders on the mindset, skillset and structural shifts that will power their organisation’s outer transition.
This means helping leaders thrive while creating ripples of positive change within their organisation and most importantly for the communities they serve and ultimately life on this planet.
It is thus not just about the leader as an “individual” but rather as part of an ecology of relationships. Within this ecology, he helps the leader feel heard, gain clarity, take action, build confidence and thrive all in service of something bigger.
How Might Tom Help?
- My first invitation is to take maximum advantage of the free content on this site.
As you are reading this, you are clearly on a fascinating journey. If you feel you would benefit from us doing some work together on some aspect of your journey, please explore this page: How Can I Serve?
- I also endeavour to answer every email so if you have any queries do reach out.
