Our Decisions Shape Us
Decisions are central to everything we do. We make countless decisions in and out of consciousness every single day.
And yet, how do we make decisions?
How do we distinguish between decisions that will echo for years and those that will fade away tomorrow?
Outside of my work, I rarely see people think about how to think about a decision and build the necessary “scaffolding”. Even when they do, it is very often a highly linear logic-driven process designed to resolve a specific issue. GOFER is an example:
- G for clarifying goals
- O for generating options
- F for finding facts
- E for considering effects
- R for reviewing and making a plan
It is uncannily similar to coaching models such as GROW (Goal, Reality, Options, Wrap-up or Way forward) and may work reasonably well for less complex one-off issues with a low number of variables.
However, such models assume that we know what needs to be decided, have access to the necessary information and that now is the right time for a decision. All these are assumptions.
Within organisations, decision-making is in practice much more fluid. Decisions are not only shaped by previous decisions (e.g., policies, practices, hiring decisions), can involve a range of stakeholders but are also potentially skewed by misplaced incentives and power dynamics.
Stepping into Decision Coaching
Coaching around decision-making (aka decision coaching) is at the heart of self-leadership and leadership. To work on our own self-leadership and leadership skills, we need to firstly become aware of the decisions we are making, how we are making them and what other options are available to us.
There is thus a major training component that over time becomes second-nature as we instinctively think differently about decisions. The ultimate purpose of decision coaching is truly to turn the client into their own decision coach. We all benefit from an outside eye on more complex decisions, but as own decision coach we can make increasingly more insightful and impactful decisions on our own.
Creating a Different Thinking Environment
When thinking about decisions it is thus important to recognise that:
decisions aren’t made in a vacuum.
Ambiguity is everywhere: In organisations, clear answers are rare. Instead of black and white, we often deal in shades of grey, navigating uncertain information and unclear preferences. Decision coaching helps clients focus on the essential and find some clarity amidst this fog.
Decisions echo over time: Unlike snap judgments, organisational decisions create lasting ripples. Decision coaching ensures you are not just reacting to today but also thinking in different timeframes.
Incentives shape choices: Rewards and penalties aren’t just abstract concepts; they are real motivators that can skew or guide our decisions. Decision coaching helps unpack these motivators, ensuring choices are taken for reasons that align with organisational goals and visions and are not just reactions to immediate incentives.
Patterns can trap us: It is easy to fall into the comfort of repeated decisions, but this can create blind spots. Decision coaching encourages fresh perspectives, breaking cycles of ‘that is how it’s always been done’.
We fall in love with solutions: Rather than clearly define the problem and drill down until we have fully understood every aspect, we often default to thinking in terms of solutions. This means we develop elegant solutions designed to solve poorly understood problems, hence the expression “a solution in search of a problem“. Decision coaching is about keeping focus on the problem.
Conflict is inevitable, but manageable: Power plays and differing agendas can steer decisions off-course. Decision coaching enables us to focus on the bigger picture, not the loudest voices.
By illuminating these challenges, decision coaching empowers more informed, balanced and impactful choices.
So, next time instead of diving in and trying to solve the particular “problem” under discussion, consider wearing your decision coaching hat and help all involved understand how they are thinking about the situation and what might be possible if they thought about it differently.
Questions in the Image:
- Decision coaching: how do I decide?
- What is the most important decision I made today?
- What does the decision say about me?
- What influenced the decision?
Nurturing Curiosity – Daily Practice: This is part of the Nurturing Curiosity series of tools, insights and questions designed to help nurture curiosity as part of our daily practice. In point of fact, every interaction we have is an opportunity to question what we are observing and how we and others are seeing the world. The more we question the more we see what may have been missing from our decision-making. The decisions we ask shape the decisions we make. There can be a tendency to be decisive and make decisions now rather than think them through. No one approach is best but they will likely result in different outcomes. How do you make decisions?
About Tom O’Leary
Tom guides bold pioneers through inner transitions towards regenerative futures.
His primary offering – through a process he calls Ecological Coaching – is about working with leaders on the mindset, skillset and structural shifts that will power their organisation’s outer transition.
This means helping leaders thrive while creating ripples of positive change within their organisation and most importantly for the communities they serve and ultimately life on this planet.
It is thus not just about the leader as an “individual” but rather as part of an ecology of relationships. Within this ecology, he helps the leader feel heard, gain clarity, take action, build confidence and thrive all in service of something bigger.
How Might Tom Help?
My first invitation is to take maximum advantage of the free content on this site.
- As you are reading this, you are clearly on a fascinating journey. If you feel you would benefit from us doing some work together on some aspect of your journey, please explore this page: How Can I Serve?
- I also endeavour to answer every email so if you have any queries do reach out.
